Sunday, January 20, 2013

Levity Behind &  Second Chances Ahead...

It is the last day of 2012.
I am about to start a new year with a chapter of my life neatly closed, as I just sold the Airstream trailer and the big GMC diesel truck that we used to travel and live during 2010 and 2011.

 
The new owner of the Airstream asked me to send him the URL for the blog that I kept during our travels as nomads without a stationary job or home. It was then that I remembered that I have killed this blog. It was no longer online. I remembered that I did this not because we have stopped traveling, but because I considered my preconceived  purpose of the journey a failure: I did not achieve levity.
Ironically, it seems that I came out of the nomadic journey even more hardened on my rigid ways.

 
When I conceived the idea of selling our house and belongings to set out on a nomadic life, I wanted to leave behind a life of...certain type of concerns.
I remember someone referring to my objective as: “Seeking the unencumbered life”


It is true, journeys have a way to make you see more clearly, especially the things you are nor particularly keen on seeing. Lessons if you will.

The first lesson:
Encumbrance comes from within.
Little did I know that I was just swapping certain type of concerns for other types. I need to be more conscious on choosing carefully what I want to be concerned about. And not let the modernity of middle-class-suburban-life-credit-centric-peace-of-mind-with-a-price-tag, mentality dictate what my concerns should be.


 
The second lesson:
Rationality and a strong will are like steel. Reliable only until the point of breakage.
Just like bending a hardened material that will not yield, change only comes comes after an abrupt spectacular breakage. Leaving a task that resembles more re-edification than change.
Still, even after taking stock on these lessons, I look back to the winter of 2009 and I would do it all over again, certainly with a different attitude, but the memories and experiences of the trip are -invaluable-

I am really looking forward for a new year, a new beginning.

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